Forgive Your Ex
Yes, it’s about time that you do.
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So you know that ex you’re still stewing over? The one that did you dirty, broke their promise, and made your life living hell?
Yes, that ex.
It’s time for you to forgive them. I know, I know. That’s the last thing on your mind. But understand this — the forgiveness is not for them, it’s for you.
Now before you click away and stop reading, hear me out.
Unfortunate things happen.
People disappoint us.
People hurt us.
They do things we never thought possible.
We trusted them. They gave us their word. We gave them our hearts.
You have every right to feel angry, bitter, resentful, and ready to key their car. But please put the key down. Keying their car won’t solve the problem. It will only create new ones.
When I went through my divorce, I had a hard time understanding what forgiveness meant. I wanted my ex-husband and me to have a peaceful relationship even if we weren’t together. But I thought forgiveness meant I had to like him, be happy around him, or even be friends.
No, hell no.
You don’t have to like the person. You don’t have to see them or interact with them (unless you share kids). You don’t even have to make conversation or talk about the weather.
But you do have to forgive- so that you can move on for yourself.
Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness.
Forgiveness does not dismiss what they did. It does not minimize the damage they caused. It doesn’t give them a get out of jail-free card. It certainly does not mean your relationship will go back to normal.
Forgiveness is so that you can lay to rest what had happened and move on with your life.
Forgiveness is for you to have peace and know what’s done is done.
